i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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