We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
