it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
