i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Randomize
