idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
