5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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