I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Hippo gnu deer
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
