Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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