he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
