i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
