Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
