After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
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