just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
nutella sex= disaster
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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