i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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