the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
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