I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
should my penis look like a turkey
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
