Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I just found a bag of teeth...
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize