Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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