Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
