I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
