I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize