Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
