so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
