I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
