I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
