how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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