Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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