i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i just google imaged poop.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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