stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize