Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
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