never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
