after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
