i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I party with great urgency now.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
