Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
