Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Do you have feelings for this penis?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize