She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
