i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
we're so committed to being not committed
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
