Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
