the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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