Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
