there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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