i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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