The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
