You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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