I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Randomize
