Christians are straight up FREAKS
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
We're not piercing ourselves today.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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