I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize