Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Randomize
