I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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