Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
