I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
The feeling are messing with the penis
He? As in you personified your dick?
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
