Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
